I Miss Being You

Dear 10-Year-Old Me,

I miss being you. I try to copy you, but I can’t leave aside everything that has happened to me since, good or bad. I have to accept that I might never be like you again, and that’s ok. I am just glad to have met you.

Some say people never change, but we both know that’s not true. You changed so much, and I am so proud of you. You are the strongest, bravest girl with the biggest heart. You went through so much so early — but you didn’t let it scar you. You managed to make friends with your bullies, those that looked at you in disgust, those that made you question your self-worth when you were only four years old. You forgave them and never reminded them of the pain they caused. They were only kids, you told yourself — ignoring that you were the same age. Ignoring that their parents were even worse to you. Just because you looked different. You forgave them as well.

I know now that it wasn’t the best idea to trust them after all. They are going to hurt you again, only this time you aren’t going to handle it as well. It is going to take you another ten years to deal with the rejection and its consequences, but you are going to get through it eventually, just like you have done before.

I survived the tough times because of you. I kept on fighting, because you had won the war before.
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Thank you for being your badass self.
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Till we meet again,

Me

Johanna
Johanna is a 20-year-old college student from Germany. She has always used books and stories to escape her reality, imagining what life would be like walking in somebody else’s shoes. When she is with her friends, she is loud, talks too much, and laughs a lot, but if she is around people she doesn’t know, she becomes quiet and very self-aware. She spends a lot of her time wanting to be like somebody else, which is why she started writing down their stories.

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