Boom snap clap

I don’t think the phrase “missing someone” does any justice to the way it actually feels.

Buh-boom snap clap snap

They say that when you go to college, you find your people. This holds true for college summer programs, too.

Boom snap clap

I was in Scotland for a month last summer, and I’m not exaggerating when I say that it was the best month of my life. Part of the best-ness was Scotland because, come on, it’s Scotland, but the friends I made in Scotland are some of my best. We spent almost every hour of every day together: we would get together for breakfast at eight in the morning and not say goodnight until midnight or, sometimes, even later. Rinse and repeat for thirty days.

Buh-boom snap clap

We were at the University of St. Andrews for a summer program in either Creative Writing, Scottish Studies, or Science. My friends were Creative Writers and Scottish Studiers, hence the closeness and the amount of time spent together. We would turn my kitchen into a kiki and laugh over Eton Mess until we were too sleepy to stand.

Stomp-stomp clap

One day, during our Creative Writing coffee break, my friend Eva taught me the “Boom-snap-clap.” If any of you don’t know what that is, it’s a rhythm game. You use different parts of your body to make the rhythm, sort of like you’re playing a drum. We boom-snap-clapped at the foot of the castle, the salty drizzle shining in our hair. (It’s addictive)

Tuh-dee tuh-dee clap snap 

In my experience, telling people the truth just makes things complicated. They can only say, “I’m sorry,” or, “I’m sorry to hear that,” so many times, and then they get bored. Well, for what felt like the first time, people listened to my life story and didn’t pity me. A moment after I stopped talking, they all started arguing over which of them could take me in for certain holidays. I’ve never smiled so much in my life.

Boom snap clap

At some point, these people stopped being my friends and started being my family, maybe even something more. None of us acknowledged the fact that it was ending until the last night when we hugged each other in a circle and cried. The change didn’t hit me until I got home. And it hit me hard.

Buh-boom snap pause —

They say you don’t know how good something is until it’s gone. They’re right. 

Boom boom snap 

I’ll never stop being thankful for those people, my friends. I will never forget what they did for me and are still doing for me. I’ll never forget their support, their friendship, and their love. And I’ll never forget their hugs.

Buh-boom snap shhhhh.

 

*Ceilidh pronounced “kay-lee.”