The Lonely Cosmic Bunny by Shelby Padgett

“What do you think about the stars?”

  “What?”

“What do you think about the stars? When you think of them, what are you thinking about?”the-pleiades-star-cluster-11637_640

    “I don’t know.”

“Oh, come on.”

“Do you know?”

“Yes.”

  “Fine. What do you think about the stars?”

“…I think they’re lonely.”

     “I’m sorry?”

“Seriously! Think about it.”

      “There’s so many!”

“Yeah, I know. To us they look so close together, but once you get closer, you realize that each one is actually millions of miles away from the next.”

“They sit there alone, burning, dying with only us to gaze and marvel at them.”

     “Wow.”

            “That’s pretty morbid.”

“Yes. I suppose it is.”

  “Ya know what I think?”

“No. What?”

“I think… I see a bunny riiiiight there.”

“Where?!”

      “There!”

“Okay, that helps no one.”

  “Well, come over here.”

“Fine.”

“Now, where?”

“Right there.”

“Oh, yeah. Yeah, I see it.”

   “There it is. Our lonely cosmic bunny.”

“Geez, pretty morbid, don’t cha think?”

  “Yeah, I do, actually.”

“What’s its name?”

       “…Mike.”

“That’s a terrible bunny name!”

  “What?! What do you want? Thumper?”

“Definitely not.”

   “Alright. What were you thinking?”

“How about… Marvin?”

   “Oh, and Mavin’s better than Mike?”

“Like Marvin the Martian!”

    “I see where you’re going, but you aren’t quite making it.”

“Fine.”

      “Stewart.”

“No.”

“Nigel?”

   “No.”

            “Roger.”

“Nope.”

“Liam.”

    “Wha- no!”

            “Alfie.”

“Alfie.”

“I can get on board with Alfie.”

    “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Alfie the Lonely Cosmic Bunny.”

  “The forgotten astrology sign.”

“How’s that? There’s one for each month.”

“Maybe it’s for the forgotten month.”

“Being?”

“Thir-tember?”

“Creative.”

     “Thank you.”

“Alright, then. What kind of traits might the good people born under the star of Alfie the Lonely Cosmic Bunny in the great month of Thri-tember possess?”

   “Well, first off, they have dark souls. One might describe them as morbid.”

“Goes without saying, I should think.”

“And yet, said, it must be.”

            “They’re thoughtful, intelligent.”

            “Beautiful.”

“Good.”

  “Determined. Good luck trying to keep up with them!”

            “When’s your birthday again?”

“Why, I’m shocked and appalled that you wouldn’t remember having celebrated my day of birth so recently on Thir-tember thirty-second!”

  “How silly of me!”

“I should say so.”

“My humblest apologizes.”

“Well, being a Lonely Cosmic Bunny, it is not in my nature to hold a grudge.”

“I’ve struck some luck.”

“So it would seem.”

     “Now, if you had to guess, which sign would you think LCBs are a best match for?”

“If I had to guess, I’d say …. Virgo.”

    “Virgo, indeed.”

            “And would you happen to remember my birthday?”

“September sixth, of course.”

    “Which would make me…”

“A Virgo.”

“Would you look at us.”

“Seems we were destined.”

“Well, I’m not one to argue with the stars.”

“Or give them an actual thought.”

“We can’t all be LCBs.”

“That’s alright. It’d be too boring if you were.”

   “So, star-crossed lovers?”

“Speaking of morbid.”

  “Shakespeare doesn’t do it for ya?”

“Shakespeare’s fine, it’s good ol’ Romes and Julie I’m not a fan of.”

    “‘Romes and Julie’?”

“I feel like we’re on a nickname basis. We’re there.”

  “Alright. Well, what exactly is your beef with ‘Romes and Julie’?”

“They’re whole relationship, which turned into marriage after a few hours, mind you, lasted a whopping three days and resulted in six deaths. I mean, love’s great and all-”

  “Is it?”

“Hmm?”

  “Is love great?”

            “…And all?”

“Well, they say falling in love is wonderful.”

   “I think I’ve heard that before.”

“That’s not uncommon.”

“It’s not wrong.”

“No?”

       “Nope.”

“So you know?”

    “Well, sometimes you just have to thank the great Lonely Cosmic Bunny, Alfie, for  the people he puts in your life.”

“Is that so?”

   “I think so.”

“Good to know.”

  “Yeah, you should really put some thought into it sometime.”

“I’ll make a note of it.”

Other than playing with her over-active pup, Social Media Director Shelby Padgett has a number of passions including music, writing, and writing about music. She has completed her Bachelor's degree in the former and hopes to continue highlighting underrepresented girls who shred. She reads as much as she can, and especially loves the writings of C.S. Lewis, F. Scott Fitzgerald, and anyone else who can make art with words. She enjoys playing her ukulele, posting gratuitous pictures of her dog, collecting mugs, and green bean casserole.

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